A hospital isn’t a place for lazy people. It’s a place for smart people who take care of people who aren’t smart enough to keep themselves healthy. So begins Children’s Hospital, a parody series that follows the lives, loves and laughs of a hospital staff.
Season 1 | Episode 1 When Cat breaks up with Owen, Lola decides to be supportive and break up with her own boyfriend, Glenn, by telling him that she has brain cancer.
Season 1 | Episode 2 Things get tense after Cat sneezed on Lola. Meanwhile, Briggs tries to get Glen back on the police force.
Season 1 | Episode 3 The Chief calls a staff meeting to discuss Lola's nonexistent brain tumor.
Season 1 | Episode 4 The Chief tries to help a boy who has aged rapidly. Meanwhile, Blake tries to help people via the healing power of laughter.
Season 1 | Episode 5 Another doctor tries to use Blake's method: the healing power of laughter.
Season 2 | Episode 1 As the new season begins, Cat Black is conflicted about her full term pregnancy, because the father (Nick Kroll) is 6 years old and has advanced aging disease; the doctors remember Lola who still seems to be dead; Chief has more than professional feelings for the new administrator; Glenn cures cancer.
Season 2 | Episode 2 Cat goes into labor with Little Nicky's baby. Little Nicky's advanced aging disease causes him to take on the tendencies of an old man as the disease begins to kill him. Lola Spratt returns from the hospital to explain that she faked her death, but everyone believes she is a ghost. Blake Downs returns to the hospital, following the failure of his private practice/spin-off. New doctor Valerie Flame takes over narrating duties on the show for Cat Black when complications occur in the birth of she and Nicky's child.
Season 2 | Episode 3 Dr. Maestro asks Dr. Flame to give him a lethal injection so that he can find Dr. Spratt in the spirit world. A creepy EMT wants to show The Chief his "sexy costume.
Season 2 | Episode 4 Dr. Blake's clown brother comes to visit and borrows money from Dr. Blake to pay off his gambling debts, while telling him it's for an operation. A mascot from a local theme park starts suspiciously, repeatedly bringing in children with broken arms for treatment. The hospital is turned into a youth hostel, and Sy gets conned by an attractive young foreign girl.
Season 2 | Episode 5 The staff must choose between saving an old black man and a young white kid. Insult comic Jeffrey Ross brings his child into the O.R., but the staff is more concerned with enjoying his humor than treating his child. Two Star Trek nerds dressed in uniforms (one as a Klingon) visit the hospital.
Season 2 | Episode 6 An episode of TV news magazine News Readers covering the filming of the final episode of Childrens Hospital, complete with behind the scenes looks at the show. Cutter Spindell (who portrays Blake Downs on the show within the show) interferes to save the series, convincing protesters that they're saving an actual children's hospital.
Season 2 | Episode 7 A knife stuck in a boy's chest may not be what it seems; Glenn's cancer cure is threatened by a mysterious visitor, a mind-reading girl visits the coma room.
Season 2 | Episode 8 When the power goes out on the hottest day of the year, sexual tensions boil over among the staff. Blake is date-raped. Dori fries eggs on her boobs.
Season 2 | Episode 9 A hip sexy Rabbi (David Wain) arrives and seduces Valerie, angering Glenn; Sy faces a moral dilemma involving a coffee machine; Lola is confused by a mysterious organ in a cooler.
Season 2 | Episode 10 "Take Your Daughter to Work" day at the hospital ignites a series of conflicts involving a leering child molester (Steve Agee), Chief's sexy daughter (Lizzy Caplan), and an 11 year-old patient whose gender is yet to be determined.
Season 2 | Episode 11 The abortion debate is brought into relief by a visit from a prominent Senator (Ed Begley, Jr.); Owen must decide whether he can treat the 10-year-old who beats him daily; Sy finally faces his alcoholism.
Season 2 | Episode 12 In a special live episode, a visiting Sultan needs emergency surgery; Blake faces a crucial decision about his clown make-up; Glenn cuts off his finger for Valerie. A surprise ending reveals the shocking the truth about one of the doctors, shattering everyone's perceptions. SEASON FINALE.
Season 3 | Episode 1 A boy stuck in quicksand is brought to the ER.
Season 3 | Episode 2 Briggs (Nick Offerman) goes undercover in the children's psych ward; Blake's ex (Sarah Silverman) resurfaces; and Chief and Glenn share a moment.
Season 3 | Episode 3 Blake is evicted from his apartment for being a clown; Dr. Brian returns to the hospital after a stint working for the drama "Black Hospital"; and Cat is overexposed.
Season 3 | Episode 4 The doctors feel crowded from sharing an apartment and decide someone should move out. Elsewhere, Sy deals with his own domestic issues.
Season 3 | Episode 5 A pediatric plastic surgeon joins the staffers; Max Von Sydow has a mix-up in the maternity ward; and Glen and Owen try to hunt down a snack.
Season 3 | Episode 6 Glenn returns from Vietnam; Lola has new career aspirations.
Season 3 | Episode 7 Lola and Brian try to locate Cat's father; the doctors wait for a prisoner's execution and plan to use his heart in a transplant procedure.
Season 3 | Episode 8 The staff receive counseling after the death of Brock Stryker (Rob Riggle).
Season 3 | Episode 9 The doctors go back in time.
Season 3 | Episode 10 Owen's secret wife (Alicia Silverstone) and baby visit the hospital for treatment; Val plays a high-stakes game of chess.
Season 3 | Episode 11 The staff work the night shift under the guidance of Velam Geza.
Season 3 | Episode 12 A day in the life of Chet (Brian Huskey), the creepy paramedic.
Season 3 | Episode 13 A long-delayed bar mitzvah for Glenn is planned; Owen wants his foreskin back.
Season 3 | Episode 14 Updates on the cast are featured on "Newsreaders" in the Season 3 finale.
Season 4 | Episode 1 In this episode, which satirizes "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo", everyone at Childrens Hospital gets amnesia. After that, it looks as though the only way to get rid of the amnesia is to give the amnesia... amnesia. I'm forgetful about what happens after that.
Season 4 | Episode 2 Madonna visits the hospital, stunning Owen.
Season 4 | Episode 3 Chief recounts her past, but the doctors aren't interested in her tale.
Season 4 | Episode 4 The doctors have free time on their hands. Lola sports a bikini.
Season 4 | Episode 5 The actors' bad behavior is caught on camera.
Season 4 | Episode 6 Owen works with a detective to get to the bottom of strange behavior by kids.
Season 4 | Episode 7 A look at the British version of "Childrens Hospital".
Season 4 | Episode 8 Single mothers receive discounts.
Season 4 | Episode 9 Sy's spy past comes back to haunt him when his former partner returns to kill him.
Season 4 | Episode 10 The events of a full year at the hospital are chronicled.
Season 4 | Episode 11 Sal Viscuso is hunted and Owen is haunted.
Season 4 | Episode 12 Lola has no friends or pets so she gets a law degree and defends Owen.
Season 4 | Episode 13 The Mafia run wild in the hospital.
Season 4 | Episode 14 The death of a cast member is examined.
Season 5 | Episode 1 The staff move to an army base in Japan when the hospital is infested with termites.
Season 5 | Episode 2 Officer Briggs needs a place to stay and a copy of Airplane! to rewatch.
Season 5 | Episode 3 A plane crash threatens a night of entertainment on the base.
Season 5 | Episode 4 The doctors gather at Cat's vacation house for her wedding to Michael.
Season 5 | Episode 5 The doctors rally to save a ward for imaginary friends.
Season 5 | Episode 6 When Lola is recruited for a government task force, the past threatens to compromise the mission.
Season 5 | Episode 7 It's Old Fashioned Day at Childrens Hospital. And it lasts longer than a day, which allows for a conflict.
Season 5 | Episode 8 Owen learns a lesson about hair choices; Glenn reveals the source of his surgical abilities.
Season 5 | Episode 9
Season 5 | Episode 10
Season 5 | Episode 11 Derek Childrens vows to regain control of the hospital from Sy. Includes fairies, a donkey head, hydraulics and poison lipstick.
Season 5 | Episode 12 David Wain's personal documentary about his friendship and rivalry with Just Falcon.
Season 5 | Episode 13 The doctors' trip to Japan comes to a climax.
Season 6 | Episode 1 Five years after leaving the army base, Owen must re-integrate into a 'normal' life at the hospital.
Season 6 | Episode 2 The doctors are summoned to the White House, by Lola, to help with a matter of national security.
Season 6 | Episode 3 Shocking DNA test results cause confusion and chaos among the staff.
Season 6 | Episode 4 Nurse Beth enters a love triangle with Glenn and Owen and the doctors try to solve a high-stakes medical mystery.
Season 6 | Episode 5 Lola may have a superpower, and Blake and Dori seek parenting advice.
Season 6 | Episode 6 Blake asks Glenn to coach him through a new romantic relationship. Chief and Cat prank call Sy. Guest stars include Lindsay Sloane, James Adomian, Paul Scheer, Nick Offerman, Jordan Peele and Brian Huskey.
Season 6 | Episode 7 The cast appears on a morning show, "Up at 5," in order to promote the upcoming Childrens Hospital movie.
Season 6 | Episode 8 Sy runs himself ragged trying to impress an influential blogger before the big hospital fundraiser gala.
Season 6 | Episode 9 In a quest to get pregnant, Val assembles a team to break into Sy's sperm bank vault to steal his prized collection.
Season 6 | Episode 10 When Sy's new girlfriend makes significant changes around the hospital, the doctors react with hostility.
Season 6 | Episode 11 Owen and Briggs work together on a murder case that has spanned fifteen years; a look into Owen and Briggs' past.
Season 6 | Episode 12 After a newspaper calls him a "rock star surgeon," Glenn worries that he will die on his upcoming 27th birthday.
Season 6 | Episode 13 Glenn returns to Sao Paolo, Brazil, for his family's weekly Shabbat dinner.
Season 6 | Episode 14 When Blake realizes that the source of his life's pain is the other doctors, he decides to take revenge.
Season 7 | Episode 1 In the seventh season premiere, the doctors find new jobs at a crosstown hospital after being fired by Blake, who turns to a life of crime with his brother, Sir Tinklebutton.
Season 7 | Episode 2 A rare disease appears at Childrens Hospital, and the team has to journey into the buried remains of the original Childrens Hospital with Val's alter-ego, Derrick Childrens, to find the cure. Meanwhile, the rest of the doctors desperately try to save the hospital's landmark millionth patient.
Season 7 | Episode 3 When Sy finally gets tenure, he decides to use its powers for the greatest good: building the world's first consumer jetpack. Elsewhere, Chief is stranded on a dance pedestal, and Owen learns just how hard it is to be the hospital DJ.
Season 7 | Episode 4 Set four years ago, Nurse Beth's origins are uncovered as we explore the world of the Nurses' Quarters in the Childrens Hospital basement. Beth has to navigate the complex social hierarchy of the nurses and avoid losing their friendship when she suddenly gets promoted to doctor.
Season 7 | Episode 5 In a "Behind the Scenes" episode, actor Just Falcon (who plays Dr. Glenn Richie) invites the rest of the Childrens Hospital cast to his special photography exhibition, where all of their shocking secrets are revealed. MOLLY SHANNON (Saturday Night Live) guest stars.
Season 7 | Episode 6 Blake, Lola and Glenn are excited to be attending this year's Doctor of the Year Convention (or DOY) in Vegas. Even though Blake has won six years in a row, Glenn and Lola are determined to win. Owen tags along to visit his mom, with surprising consequences.
Season 7 | Episode 7 After discovering that Childrens Hospital is out of tongue depressors, Owen finds himself embroiled in a dangerous hospital-wide conspiracy that reaches all the way up to Governor Jasper Ruth, the Boss Tweed of Sao Paulo, Brazil. GEORGE WENDT guest stars.
Season 7 | Episode 8 A race horse is wanted by fearsome mob boss Mamma Fiorucci, so Chief hides the animal in the hospital, all while Lola's college barbershop quartet tempts her into rejoining and Glenn glues Blake's hands into his latex gloves. VALERIE HARPER and WILL SASSO guest star. Recurring guest star BRIAN HUSKEY also appears.
Season 7 | Episode 9 Owen discovers that the fluid in Chief's hump tastes exactly like Coca Cola. Despite Chief's protests, Owen attempts to monetize her "hump cola," while Blake suspects Glenn has an addiction problem and takes him to Nils Vildervaan, professional rehabilitationalimist. MICHAEL SHOWALTER guest stars.
Season 7 | Episode 10 A look back at an episode of the popular 1950s variety show The Show You Watch, known for its irascible host, hilarious skits and elaborate dances, but mostly revered for its weekly visit to Childrens Hospital, the sketch upon which the present day show is loosely based.
Season 7 | Episode 11 When Dr. Cat Black has a crisis of faith, the hospital's resident spiritual leaders fiercely compete against each other to convert her and win a monthly sales prize. Glenn grows frustrated that he isn't getting the respect he deserves for playing second bass in the L.A. punk band X. Guest stars include the band X (DJ BONEBRAKE, EXENE CERVENKA, JOHN DOE and BILLY ZOOM), along with JASON ANTOON, TOM ARNOLD, DICK CAVETT, RANDALL PARK and ALAN SMYTH.
Season 7 | Episode 12 It's "Bring Your Grandparents to Work Day" at the hospital. The doctors struggle with their grandparents, whether they're overbearing, trying to kill themselves or are just famous actors. BARRY BOSTWICK guest stars.
Season 7 | Episode 13 When Glenn and Owen experience bizarre hallucinations and Lola fears she's being followed by an imaginary doctor, they think a gas leak in the hospital might be to blame. But what they discover threatens to upset the entire future of Childrens Hospital.... ZANDY HARTIG, BRIAN HUSKEY and ANNE-MARIE JOHNSON guest star.
Season 7 | Episode 14 When Glenn and Owen experience bizarre hallucinations and Lola fears she's being followed by an imaginary doctor, they think a gas leak in the hospital might be to blame. But what they discover threatens to upset the entire future of Childrens Hospital.... ZANDY HARTIG, BRIAN HUSKEY and ANNE-MARIE JOHNSON guest star.